


Fever Scare

by FFanon



Series: Sam's Second Chance [2]
Category: Sweet Virginia (2017)
Genre: Angst and Feels, Dad!Sam, F/M, Parenthood, couple fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 13:04:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14237895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FFanon/pseuds/FFanon
Summary: When Lily gets sick for the first time, Sam's tragic past surfaces in his reaction





	Fever Scare

**Author's Note:**

> For those who have not seen 'Sweet Virginia', it is alluded that Sam had a young daughter who passed away. My headcanon is that she died from an illness.

The first time Lily gets a fever she’s four months old and it’s three in the morning.

 

The baby monitor is next to Sam who is asleep on his stomach, his left arm draped over you as you sleep with your back almost right up against him. Your right hand tucked under your pillow as your left hand is limp against his.

 

The monitor comes to life first with quiet whimpers that are still too low for two exhausted parents to hear.  But soon enough constant wails are flying out of it and two heads pop up as bleary eyes are blinked several times.

 

“I’ll go,” you yawn as you shift under his arm and get up.

 

A tired squint to his eyes, he’s up on his forearms, watching you in the dark room, “I’m coming too,” he rubs his face with one hand, “You just move too damn fast,” and despite the low gravel of his voice, you can make out the amused tone to his statement which gets a tired grin out of you as you walk out of the bedroom.

 

Sam grunts at the stiffness in his leg as he sits up, pushing the sheets aside from his body as he brings his feet to the floor. Sitting on the edge of the bed, he stretches the injured leg out for a quick second. Just as he’s about to stand up, the wailing is at the doorway.

 

He turns his head to see you holding the littlest Rossi with a concerned look.

 

“She’s burning up.”

 

He stands up and quickly moves to you, placing a gentle hand on his daughter’s forehead. He believed you, but it’s just parental instinct to feel for it too.

 

“Take her so I can get the thermometer.”

 

He takes a crying Lily into his arms, nestling her into the crook of his arm as she waves her tiny arms around, face scrunched up as she cries.  

 

“Aw, sweetheart, I know,” he coos as he gives her belly a couple rubs, following you back to her nursery as he gently rocks his arms to attempt at calming her.

 

He places her on the changing table and removes her onesie then her diaper as you prep the thermometer.

 

With a hand on the crown of her small head and his other holding her tiny feet up to keep her still, you insert the rectal thermometer all while telling her how sorry you are to have to do it.  Sam smooths his thumb over her forehead as the thermometer beeps.

 

Taking it out, you look to see she does in fact have a high fever.  Informing your boyfriend, you grab a new diaper to put on her.

 

“Okay,” you take a deep breath to try to refrain from freaking out, “All the baby books said that a fever doesn’t necessarily mean something really bad. I’ll just call-” and as you’re trying to talk some sense to convince yourself, Sam cuts you off.

 

“We gotta go to the hospital.”

 

He says it just as you finish putting her diaper on.

 

“What? We do? Why do you say that?” and you’re honestly curious because you’re so nervous right now.

 

“Fevers mean infections,” and his fingers start gently prodding Lily’s body, “Who knows what it could be. Her doctor can’t give us a good answer over the phone.”

 

“What are you feeling for?”

 

“Any swollen glands or anything.”

 

Your mouth feels dry as you quickly dress her back into her onesie.

 

Sam picks her up, cradling her to his naked chest. Lily’s tears instantly wet his skin.

 

“Come on sweet pea, we’re gonna get you checked out, okay?” he kisses her warm head.

 

Within fifteen minutes, you both threw on clothes and packed up a small bag of things for Lily before getting into the car.

 

Sitting in the rear seat of Sam’s new pick up truck, with your daughter in her carrier next to you, you rub her little belly as you speak softly to her.  The poor girl has only stopped crying to hiccup a few times.

 

As Sam drives, he continues with his almost clinical approach on the situation.

 

“They may have to run a few tests on her. Ones with needles and x-rays, so try to prepare for that possibility.”

 

You try to stay focused on Lily because Sam’s words have you feeling more and more anxious.

 

Throughout waiting to be seen he kept mentioning all these things that they may do to your little baby and all the possible things they may find. Despite his straight forward way of speaking, his leg was bouncing in the waiting room and he kept caressing her tiny cheeks and her back as you held her close.  He was nervous too.

 

Sam never noticed that you weren’t really responding to him when he spoke. Or the way you were almost protectively clutching a crying Lily to your chest.  

 

He had unknowingly wound you up so much that when the ER nurse took her from your arms to examine her a little better, a loud sob left your body as tears started to fall.

 

The nurse and Sam looked at you with a bit of surprise but you quickly covered your mouth and waved them off as an attempt to say you were okay.

 

He wrapped an arm around your back and kissed your temple.

 

After the nurse handed Lily back to you, she said the doctor would be with you soon and moved past the privacy curtain to leave you three alone.

 

“You okay?” he quietly asks.

 

Rubbing your fussy daughter’s back, her cries filling your ear, you shake your head as your tear-filled eyes look at him.

 

“No. You’re scaring the shit out of me!” you quietly hiss before a small sob leaves you again. Pressing your face to Lily’s head, you give her a kiss there.

 

He looks taken aback, but just as he’s about to say something the doctor enters through the curtain. After a quick repetition of what the nurse looked at, she diagnoses Lily with a simple ear infection.

 

The relief you feel is indescribable.

 

A dose of antibiotics and a prescription for more and you’re finally able to leave just as the sun starts to rise.

 

The car ride home is quiet. Neither of you speaking. Your eyes glued to Lily who has finally started to quiet down as the pain reliever in the antibiotics kicks in. All the while Sam is glancing at you in the rearview mirror.

 

Both of you put her in her crib so she can get some much needed rest.

 

Once she’s confirmed sleeping, you walk past him heading downstairs to the kitchen to make some coffee.

 

You hear him enter the kitchen behind you. As you turn around, you both speak the same words together - “I’m sorry.”

 

“What are you sorry for?” he questions with sincerity.

 

You feel shameful and embarrassed, “For snapping at you,” you take a short breath that you quickly exhale, “You just made me so nervous, Sam. All your talk of tests and diseases and...and I was already so worried with just the fever…”

 

Sam rubs his hand as he glances between you and the ground with an embarrassed expression of his own.

 

“...but my own worries aside, I do understand where you were coming from,” you add softly and he finally holds your stare, “...you went through one of the most traumatic things someone can go through. So, I don’t blame you for getting scared at the first sign of an illness or - or for starting to run through some kind of mental checklist of symptoms. We both panicked...we just did it differently,” you shrug.

 

Sam shakes his head, “No, you don’t owe me an apology. I’m the only one who should be sorry.”

 

“Sam,” you say in disagreement but he raises his hand to signal that he has more to add.

 

“You’re right, I did panic. All I thought was that I was going to relive the past with our own daughter.  But you don’t deserve to put up with that. She’s our first child, but more importantly she’s your first child. And it was the first time she was sick which I know comes with its own set of fears without someone like me throwing a gallon of gasoline on the fire…” he sighs, “I never meant to scare you, baby. God, I’m so sorry.”

 

In seconds you’ve moved to him, hugging him with your arms around his neck as you steady on your tiptoes.  Sam’s arms wrap around you, his face nuzzles your neck.

 

“We’re both new at this in different ways,” you tell him.

 

He lifts his head and moves a hand to smooth down the back of your hair before cradling the back of your head; he kisses your temple, “Yeah,” he mumbles against your skin.

 

You pull your head back to be able to kiss him. During, he pulls you against his body more, hand rubbing your back.

 

“What do you say we skip the coffee and just head back to bed?” he asks as he starts to feel the effects of a surprise 3am wake up call.

 

“That’s a much better idea,” you kiss his cheek before unwrapping yourself from him. But before you fully step back from him, his soft grip on your hip stops you.

 

Bringing his hand to your cheek, he tenderly brushes his knuckles against your skin, and without even speaking - just seeing his soft, sad stare - you know he’s still upset that he made you cry.

 

A slight lean into his touch before you cradle his beard and kiss him.

 

“Come on,” you whisper, taking his hand, “I need your body heat right now,” a soft grin to get one out of him.

 

And you do. His own grin appears as his thumb rubs your hand.

 

Once you’re both settled into bed, he leans over you. Leaning on his forearm placed above your head as his other hand caresses your skin under your shirt. One arm you have wrapped around his bare, strong shoulders as your other rubs his back.

 

The two of you slowly kiss one another - no rushing, no teasing. Just a sensual make out session that you two don’t get as much as you used to now with being parents.

 

When Sam wakes up hours later, the dark sky indicating he slept the day away, your side of the bed is empty.  There’s no sound of the shower running or the smell of coffee floating up the stairs so he knows you’re in Lily’s room.

 

As he gets out of bed, scratching his beard, he starts making his way down the hall to see his girls.

 

The sound of your hushed voice stops him outside the door, out of view.

 

Settled in the armchair, having finished nursing your little one, she’s snuggled in your arms. Her beautiful brown eyes that she got from Sam are staring up at you as her eyelids start getting heavy.  

 

“You gotta do me a favor, lovebug,” you keep your voice quiet so Sam can’t hear you if he’s awake.

 

Tears well up in your eyes, as you swallow a lump in your throat as you continue, “You have to stay as healthy as you can, okay? Not just for you and me, but for your daddy.”

 

Sam’s head is bowed and the minute you finish your sentence, tears fill his eyes and roll down his cheeks.

 

“He loves you so so much. And you are _so_ lucky to be his little girl,” you smile as you rub her tiny fist, “He deserves to see one of his babies grow up, so you have to try, honey, okay? Just…” you kiss her sleeping form as one of your tears falls onto her cheek, “Just, try,” you whisper.

 

It takes you a few minutes to slowly stand up and gently place her back in her crib. Wiping your tears, you sniffle and run a hand through your hair before leaving her room.

 

A small gasp you make when you find Sam standing there, now noticing his watery eyes and knowing he heard your quiet plea to your daughter.

 

You don’t know what to say, but he finally speaks.

 

His voice is soft, his words tender -

 

“I didn’t think I could fall any more in love with you than I already was.”

 

You feel your cheeks heat up as you can’t help but smile at his sweet words, your eyes teary from seeing his own.

 

“I didn’t mean for you to hear me,” you think to explain.

 

“I know,” he cups your cheek with a loving, small grin.

 

You move into him more, placing your hands on his waist as you tip your head back a bit to look up at him, “I just want you to be happy. I don’t want you to be constantly worried that something may be wrong with her.  You deserve some kind of peace.”

 

He smooths his hand over your hair as he leans down to kiss you, “I am happy. Unbelievably happy. You and our baby girl are what do that for me,” he kisses your forehead, “And I don’t want to worry, I don’t. But I think I just need a little more time before I’m able to actually realize that.”

 

“Okay,” you give an encouraging smile as you smooth your hand over his heart.

 

Sam brings his hands to either side of your neck, his thumbs brushing your jaw as he kisses you. It’s tender and sweet and it leaves you both so warm inside.

 

As you open your eyes when you both slowly pull away, you slide your hands to his back and upward to press against his shoulder blades.

 

Keeping your voice low because the moment just feels so beautifully intimate.

 

“I’m so head over heels for you, it’s ridiculous,” you have a cute, shy grin on your face as you look at one another.

 

An amused breath leaves him as his thumbs stroke your jaw, his hands still on you.

 

“Makes two of us,” he sweetly nudges the tip of his nose against yours.

 

Smiling, you press your lips to his.

 

When you pull away, you both slowly release your hold on one another.

 

“I need coffee,” you say as you both start heading downstairs. You feel him rub the back of your neck briefly before giving your panty covered butt a playful squeeze.

 

“Yeah. How do pancakes for dinner sound?” Sam asks.

 

“Oh my god, like the best thing!” you excitedly answer, looking back at him as you head to the counter to the coffee pot.

 

“Gotta whip ‘em up quick before your mini-me wakes up,” he rubs his hairy chin before grabbing a mixing bowl.

 

“ _My_ mini-me? She has your eyes and I swear she has your smile."

 

“Yeah well, aside from having your nose and looking like she’s gonna have your hair color, you two have something else in common,” he glances at you as he grabs the pancake mix from the food pantry.

 

“And what’s that?” you turn to him.

 

“I never loved anyone the way I love the two of you.”


End file.
